You Can't Think Yourself Thin

So it's a week shy of 8 months since my LapBand surgery.  I just had a fill yesterday and was waiting for the "shock collar" of restriction, but nothing feels different yet.  It's only the morning after and I'm seriously hoping for what one bandster says, "a fill can sneak up on you."  


You know those stages of grief made famous by Elisabeth Kubler Ross?  Looking back over the past 8 weeks, I recognize that I have been in the bargaining phase.  I've been trying to bargain with some unknown power (sadly I think it's myself) about losing more weight.  You see, the first 60 pounds came off fairly steadily because I followed the rules to the letter.  In fact I made following the rules my new addiction.  But then I got bored, like I always did on my myriad previous diets, because you can't live your life on a diet.  You have to make the diet your way of life.  Holy fuck!  Now that's a revelation.  


So this past 8 weeks I have been bargaining mostly about exercise.  I hate it.  I do not want to exercise my body, only my brain.  I love nothing more in life than sitting on the couch with my laptop, playing word games, Facebooking, and eBaying.  Problem is, the weight is standing completely s.t.i.l.l.  Of course it is!!  
My mental parrying with my "self" sounds something like this:

ME: I bet I could use one of those ab belts that electronically stimulates the muscles and then I wouldn't have to exercise.  AND I could use it while sitting on the couch. 

 "Other" ME: Well what are the odds that you'll get the same workout as if you'd get up and exercise?

 ME: Well movie stars use them, so they must work.  

"Other" ME: So help me God if you say that out loud to anyone, I'll strangle you.

Needless to say, I haven't gotten off the couch, and now I'm not even wearing the ab belt (or the arm stimulator.)  (Or the bottom toner skirt.)  Seriously, someone call the shrink.  


Speaking of shrink . . . I started online therapy - the "Shrink Yourself" program.  It's a 12 week self-guided therapy program designed to help you uncover the emotional motivations for eating and to develop strategies to combat them.  I did it through week three and haven't gone back for the past three weeks.  How is this a surprise??  We were just about to start the session on exercise and finding out the reasons we make excuses - discovering why we don't exercise.  Coincidence?  I think not.  *sigh*


OK, so the next time you see me, or read me, or whatever . . . please ask me how the exercise is going, huh??